Friday night I went out with my flatmate who is actually starting to creep me out. He has always been obsessed with sex and stupid things like that, but i just put it down to his age and his lack of experience with girls (he is 22). Lately though its been getting a bit much. He said to my best friend J "you know we'll end up sleeping together, dont you?" and she has a boyfriend who he knows. He says things like " i like to watch the girls bums and boobs when they are running at the gym" and is always going on about lesbians and stuff. Its all so immature and a little bit unnerving. Its no wonder that he doesnt have a girlfriend when he has that attitude to women. Anyway, we were in the pub having a perfectly nice normal time, when he suddenly asked me for some of my hair. What the fuck?!   So needless to say that was a pretty short evening.

Saturday night was game night. Always bound to have some random events attached to it. This particular night the neighbour from next door randomly turned up drunk half way through the evening which was hilarious. He kept saying something about needing his passport to go to Gosport, it was soo funny. Then he left, but somehow let himself back into the flat at like 4 in the morning and played twister with us, which he somehow won!! I spoke to Rob on the phone, and for the life of me I cannot remember what I said to him. God I hope I didnt say anything to stupid, I suppose the fact that I was totally fucked and what later happened with K might exonerate me if I said anything slightly along the lines of "i really fancy you"

I ended up pulling my friends housemate K, who is cute but they dont like him that much. They say that he is boring and moans about crap. I just dont think he fits into their little clique, which to be fair, is damn near impossible to get into. He was sweet though. We didn't have sex because I was too drunk and fed up of making drunken mistakes like that, but I did stay over in his bed. I was way too fucked to walk back on my own anyway, so I thought I might as well stay and have a few kisses and cuddles. I actually think, from what I can remember and what he was like in the morning that he would be quite a good shag. I remember that he had a big cock anyway . He is only 20 so I did feel like a bit of a cradle snatcher... What is worse though is that its all just making me look bad. I think. I mean last week it was the idiot C, this week it was K although I didn't actually have sex with either of them. I just dont want Rob to think that I am a total ho. Not that it matters what he thinks of me really, as its never going to come to anything really in the end.

Sunday bloody stalker boy ex turned up. It was awful. He was begging me for another chance. It was so painful, I hate to see him so upset and I hate the fact that it is me that has caused him to be that hurt. At one point I nearly cracked and took him back, but I know in my heart that things will never change so it would be pointless. Plus I'm enjoying myself being on my own. Its fun meeting guys and hooking up with people and making all the pointless mistakes and errors in judgement.

I need a master plan for this weekend. Rob is coming down thursday for the meal and drinks, so I will see him then and Saturday night. Got to be a bit aloof though, dont want him to definately know that i'd be well up for it (although I have a sneaking suspicion that I told him that on Saturday night ). I will be getting drunk though...Must remember not to get too drunk, its not attractive and will lead to mistakes. The trouble is I'll be nervous. I have to say to myself in my head "its not going to happen, so dont get your hopes up" and not get shit faced. Was hoping to have some coke for thursday, just to take the edge off so i wont be so bloody nervous, but cant get it til Friday which is a major pain in the arse. At least I'll have it for the party though, which is the main thing.

I wonder what K thinks of me. It was all just so random. I dont think I fancy him. He is cute and he is actually quite funny, but he doesnt occupy my mind. But he might be a good back up plan if Rob gives me the cold shoulder. That might be crossing a line though sleeping with a friends flatmate...Hmm minefield...